I have been spending time in 1 John 4. The whole chapter is really amazing. It’s also the one chapter I’m probably living out the least in my life. It has convicted me in such a way that I am purposeful to start releasing hurts.
Highlighting a few verses really does little for heart healing. So I grabbed a notebook and wrote down the first name I thought of who I was carrying a grudge against.
A person that I was so upset with last fall over her behavior and attitude … one could say, pretty accurately, that I “hated” this person. I also wrote down her friend and co-conspirator.
I wrote down that family member who crossed the line and offended me greatly. I wrote down another who passive aggressively tries to make me feel bad every time we talk.
I wrote down a partner who accused me of something I did not believe I was doing, but maybe … I did? And rather than work it out with her seeking clear communication … I shut the door instead.
I wrote down that blogger’s name who I knew lied and was misleading.
I wrote down that friend of a friend’s who is so insecure she talks too much and makes every single thing about her. She really just needs to know she is loved, but I hated instead.
I wrote down those two ladies at church who gossip about me behind my back. I should’ve been praying for them but I hate instead.
I wrote down that friend’s name who got too busy to keep up with me. I could have been understanding, but I let a grudge fester and overwhelm.
It’s really hard to be in God’s Word sometimes. Especially when you think you’re only going to write down one or two names yet you fill the front and back of a sheet of paper with names of people you’ve been harboring some type of hate against.
There isn’t much I can do to reconcile those relationships. Quite honestly some I would never try to mend because they were unhealthy, and it is to my benefit to be free from them.
Yet this little process has truly opened my eyes to how slow I am to love and quick I am to hold hurts. How those hurts can ultimately transform into hates.
Hating is easy because it requires very little effort.
Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.
If we love one another, God lives in us and his love is made complete in us.
God is love.
Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in him.
We love because he first loved us. If anyone says I love God yet hates his brother he is a liar. For anyone who does not love his brother, whom he has seen, cannot love God, whom he has not seen. And he has given us this command: whoever loves God must also love his brother.